24M2k6: The 24 Marathon Project
The crisis… is over.
I’ve watched all of the first four seasons of Fox’s hit prime-time real-time counterterrorism thriller, 24. Days One and Two were put down in about 38 consecutive hours, the slower Day Three was finished during the week, and Day Four went down after about 19 hours uninterrupted.
Having never seen the show before, I approached it from the perspective of a complete outsider. I knew very little about the show beyond its structural premise, but I wanted to understand more about the world these characters — these heroes — worked so hard to protect.
I also wanted to exact the boundaries between man and television. Could it break my will? My psyche? Were the cruel, brutal realities of the TERR’R lying at my doorstep more singularly horrifying than any honest citizen should have to endure? Could there be even a desperate hope that at least one man had the courage and dedication to sacrifice everything most precious to him to save the lives of innocent people?
In times such as these, we couldn’t possibly need that man more than right here, right now, and so I took this show’s challenge. Yes, my countrymen, I *will* sit on this couch for as long as it takes to see the job done. I will take reality into my hand like a loaded revolver, point it at my head and pull the fucking trigger if I have to. You’ve read the demographics. You know what I’m capable of doing. I will chop a human being into pieces with an axe to prove my dedication not just to my assigned weekly time slot, but to entire weekends of my life at a time. I will schedule vacation time off from work if I have to.
The question is: can you handle *me*. Because I know you don’t like the way I work. But you have to put politics and your personal prejudices against rotten hippies aside just for once, and work with me. Think about it. While mere billions of dollars in advertising revenue stand between you and utter global media domination, I’m the only leverage you have. All I want is to know that I’m safe from TERR’R.
My favorites are the first and second season, but the fourth starts and ends the best of all of them. I know enough now about how to behave in a crisis to be a model citizen. It’s for our own good that we do as we’re told by the people who are risking their lives and their families to keep us safe, whatever the cost. If you don’t believe us, watch us blow some shit up. Do you believe us now, TERR’R?
Also, I’ve learned that in any negotiation, the key is the hostage. If you know who your hostage is, you know what your enemy must believe you’re willing to do if you don’t get what you want. So whether it’s the President’s daughter, a TERR’RIST’S daughter, or just a crappy inkjet print of a digital camera photo, use your hostage.
But above all else, remember what we’re defending: our freedom. When millions of lives are at stake, we have no choice. It’s not your choice to make. The choice is ours, and it’s up to you to have to make that choice. It’s your only choice: your choice. The choice is yours but you have to choose the only choice you have left to choose. Which choice that is, is up to you. That’s what we’re here to defend. And millions of lives are at stake. It’s called Freedom.